LISTENING EQUALS SUCCESS
July 17th, 2007
Although it was not particularly a smashing surprise to anyone with a realistic perception of business, the discovery made by the Rand Corporation of California years ago was a revelation of dramatic proportions to the intellectual community: NOBODY LISTENS!
It took hundreds of studies to determine that committees composed of brilliant minds in the business world generally produced the most ineffective reports in the history communication.
The reason is because nobody listens!
The Rand Study found that each member of a typical control committee was so eager to be heard that he or she never bothered to listen to what any others in the group were saying during their turns to speak. Each was rehearsing a personal message so energetically that no thought was ever given to what anyone else was saying.
The same situation is frequently true of an everyday conversation between two people who are closely related in a business situation. The communication can also be with a friend, with a boss, with a family member, with a spouse, with a child or with a possible future employer.
How many times can you think of where you have heard this phrase, “You’re NOT listening to me!”
The tone of voice used to make this statement is one that you are unlikely thrilled to receive. Most individuals will frantically try to retrieve from their short-term memory what was just said. It is again unlikely that they will remember the pertinent information. When someone is talking, it is impossible to really hear what is being said!
What is most challenging is that you probably openly need to admit that indeed you have not been listening! You have been moving ahead in your own mind, assuming that the conversation is going in a certain direction and you can always catch up with it later.
But, somehow it has changed course and you find yourself all alone out there somewhere on another side track that is not switched into the main line at all!
Listening is an art form, and in order to communicate effectively, you must master the basic rules.
We all were born with two ears and only one mouth for a reason. Stated beautifuly by the Big Bad Wolf in Little Red Riding Hood… “The better to hear you with.”
Nancy J. Phillips, CPC
